Robert The Doll (2015) Review

Spoiler-free so you can read before you watch

Robert The Doll (2015) Review

Horrorific content by Yo Adrian on August 17th, 2018 | Movie Review, Worth Watching? | Cursed, Supernatural, Doll

It’s about a cursed doll that terrorizes a family in a way that's less funny than Chucky, less scary than Annabelle, less creative than Dolly Dearest, slower than  Pinocchio’s Revenge, with less atmosphere than Death Doll and with acting worse than Black Devil Doll From Hell.

Robert The Doll was directed by Andrew Jones and stars Lee Bane (from Theatre of Fear), Megan Lockhurst  and Flynn Allen .

He wants to be your best friend...forever.

Robert the Doll Review

I've always been a fan of Chucky, I really liked both Annabelle's and am into horrors based off real-life things. The thing in this case is Robert, a doll that has been surrounded by supernatural lore for over 100 years and that now resides behind glass at a museum in Florida.

So when I saw Robert was on Amazon Prime I had to give it shot, even though I knew it wasn't likely to be great. Within 10 minutes I regretted it.

Robert the Doll is a really, really bad movie. Really bad. In every way. There's so many things wrong about this movie, starting with the fact that the kid in this movie is WAY too old to think a talking doll is totally normal. And his dad was WAY too young to strongly profess that boys don't play with dolls. Within 20 minutes I was dead bored and on my phone, looking through user reviews of this movie. What I found were many others who had suffered through this "horror" movie before me. Here is but a sampling of what they had to say:

"Literally painful to watch it was so bad" - karlycarman
This movie makes Chucky look like Lawrence of Arabia." - zachp-096101
"the doll was a better actor than the cast" - jhereklazo
"Oh my lord..." - gimmeigotit
"Every scene had me re-evaluating what I considered a bad movie" - smthegamer
"This movie was one of the most unbelievable pieces of crap I have ever made myself sit through" - dcarsonhagy

Worth Watching?

Oh, I don't know. What do you think curiouscarnivore?
"A fail from start to finish"
 
 


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